A Word About Respect

by Lady Sinn

"Respect" does not mean "submission." Granting others the place they have chosen for themselves does not make you indebted to them, nor does it indicate your full agreement with their ways.

Don't use respect as a "gift." Simply offer it.

Don't use respect as a "weapon." Those who don't deserve your respect will lose it, but it shouldn't be dangled like a carrot. The idea that everyone must work to "earn" your respect is disrespectful in itself. Everyone deserves respect unless they prove themselves unworthy of it.

Use the proper form of address in lifestyle-friendly spaces. No one but your Master needs to be addressed as "Master." However, all Dominants should be addressed as "Ma'am" or "Sir" regardless of their age, their experience or how you personally feel about them. If they don't wish to be addressed by title, they will tell you so. (If you have had an unpleasant personal experience with someone, and therefore truly believe they are undeserving of your respect, ask your Master's permission before excluding a title.)

It is not your place to determine a person's stature or to decide if they meet the requirements for "Master" or "slave" or "top" or "bottom," etc. No one has to meet your requirements unless you are directly involved with them. In the absence of a structured method of community collaboration regarding titles, it is prudent to assume each person deserves your respect.

It is unfair to say, in one breath, that the D/s community is so diverse that nothing holds true for everyone, and in the name breath judge someone by saying, "That person has no business calling himself a Master" because the community has not determined him to be one. People will rise and fall on their own merit.

Lady Sinn

"If all the world is a stage...
Who is the audience?"