We Are Us: Laws, rules, and taboos

by Laura Goodwin

BDSM used to be an outlaw thing, plain and simple... in this century, anyway. To break law, rules and taboos all you had to do was do it. The outlaw types were simply happy, but people who liked BDSM for its own sake (who experienced it as a source of certain virtues) were unhappy about BDSM's forbidden status. A significant number of us become criminals simply by virtue of the fact that we practice BDSM where it's illegal. To make honest people out of some criminals, often all you have to do is undo one misbegotten law.

Activists were mobilized by this notion, and to good effect. Although BDSM is still technically against the law in many otherwise civilized places, we have made great progress toward winning public acceptance for the lifestyle. Public opinion is always one step ahead of the law. It's more than just a matter of time, though, before decriminalization takes hold. It's also a matter of dealing somehow with the concerns of the practitioners among us who cherish BDSM's bad reputation, and who have deeply personal reasons for wishing to work against the activists who are working for decriminalization.

If ~you~ have a fetish for being considered naughty, and the only thing that makes you naughty is that you are into BDSM, then ya got trouble, my friend. Among organized leatherfolk, non-"Safe-Sane-Consensual" is the new taboo, but don't let desperation drive you into unsafe practices only to maintain your cherished "naughty" status. You could turn to other illegal activities, such as pot-smoking or jaywalking, to recapture that old thrill, but then wouldn't that make the organized leather community responsible for creating a new wave of crime, as they simultaneously end another? It wouldn't be your fault, and that's no fun, so don't bother.

BDSM is often considered morally bad, even where there are no laws against it. Some of us like the fact that BDSM is generally regarded as an evil and decadent thing to enjoy... that's the attraction, for some of us. Those who don't subscribe to such moral frameworks can shrug off the idea of BDSM as evil and outsider's disapproval, unless those superstitions continue to be honored as law. There will always be people who will insist on thinking of BDSM as moral depravity and a one-way ticket to Hell, and some of them will be us... but that's no reason why we can't be a LEGAL one-way ticket to Hell.

Some people will never be content to view sadomasochistic acts as advanced psycho-erotic techniques, nor the more able, bold and creative people among us as anything but extremely degraded. They don't see evidence of what is noblest in humanity... beauty, art, skill, courage, sexual prowess, mental and physical daring... they see evidence of all that is most low in humanity... and that's how they like it. They like to see filth, and emotional distress, and danger, and pain....well, sure, but don't we all? Face it, a taste for the "low", the "animal" things is totally common, and therefore does not make you special.

BDSM as practiced by most men and women is in essence a dramatic erotic sport. This should be legal. A tiny number of individuals are fanatically dedicated and to them it's more. This should be legal. Some people make a career out of it. This too should be legal.

Where the law should take an interest is where it legitimately has an interest: in controlling the damage done by the toxic few who misuse human nature to prey upon other human beings, leaving a trail of devastation. That kind of thing might be even be legal, depending upon who you devastate for, but it shouldn't be.

Edge play, like developing an act where you balance 16 people on one bicycle, is cool, and should be legal. That's what we are fighting for. Know the hazards, take responsibility, and go nuts... what the heck!

Edge play, like nobody really can tell what you won't do and they worry about you, is not cool now, and nothing is going to make it cool, ever. So, if you were concerned about that one, relax: we can't defend it, but it's slippery enough that we can't do anything to prevent it, either.

This essay and all site contents Copyright L. Goodwin 1990 -2001