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WAXING

A TRIP TO ECSTASY INTRODUCTION

by Stewart Siegel of Fetish Alliance
http://www.fetishalliance.net

Hot wax, in sex play is used to increase Adrenalin and thus arousal.

Hot wax play, in it simplest form is when consenting adults hold the candle over a partner and drip wax, sometimes until a large mound is formed. Occasionally people will drip wax on their partner's (usually bottom's/submissive's) genital area or insert a long candle into the anus and let the wax run down the sides of the candle until the anal area is obscured.

The temperature of the wax hitting the bottom/submissive is regulated by the distance the candle is held above the partner, becoming cooler in proportion to its height. Ice and/or cold water is kept on hand for accidents or simply to alternate the sensations.

The following information is provided so that you may have an understanding of the literature that has been written about using wax in you sex play.

This information was obtained from researching published materials (with some editorializing by this author) and is intended only as information.

There is no intent for any person engaging in waxing during sex play to rely on this material when you engage in such play. Neither "Fetish Alliance," its sponsors, the members of the sponsoring group, either individually or collectively, or this researcher take any responsibility for how any reader of this information may use the information.

In short, we accept no responsibility, implicit or explicit because how you play is your business, not ours.

FORESIGHT (related to hot waxing)
It is generally believed that it is essential, for safety's sake, that the temperature of any wax used stay under 110 degrees F. If wax gets hotter than this, scalding of your partner may occur. The temperature of wax can be tested on the inside of your wrist just as though you were checking the temperature of milk in a baby bottle.

A supply of sterile, non-fuzzy dressing like Telfa pads and a nearby source of very cold water can be useful if things get too hot.

Flammable fumes, like poppers, have been known to ignite when near open flames.

Restraints:
During heat scenes, the bottom/submissive normally should be well restrained.

During hot wax scenes mild restraints may be appropriate because:

Some of the scenes are enhanced by the ability of the bottom/submissive to add

  • hot wax directly
    (like being handed candles and instructed to add wax to sensitive parts)
  • hot wax indirectly
    (when votives, that have been "attached" to the bottom/submissive are allowed to pool and the bottom/submissive moves or is moved --- the wax flows --- and the fun begins.)

Also, some bottoms/submissives, with the tops/dominates approval, prefer mental restraints.

The skin of your body varies not just in thickness but also in the number of nerve endings. The inside of your arm is more sensitive than the outside. Your genitals are not only made of thinner skin, but they are also laced with a myriad of nerves. Don't assume that if he can tolerate something on his chest that he'll be able to take an equal amount on his nuts.

Remember, the head of the cock is one of the most exquisitely sensitive parts of the body; any kind of irritant applied there -- whether heat, cold, or a chemical stimulant -- will hurt most bottoms/submissives. The cock shaft, ball sack, perineum ( the ridge between the balls and the asshole), nipples, and asshole are also more sensitive than many other areas (that's why they're so much fun to play with). This researcher is not familiar enough with the female genital counterparts to provide any insight also the written materials used in this research did not cover this important area of information.

Do not assume that what a bottom/submissive can tolerate easily on, say, his butt or thigh can safely be duplicated on other more sensitive areas.

Another way to say this is don't assume that if he can tolerate something on his chest he'll be able to take an equal amount on his nuts. The simple changing of the type of candle you are using on his nuts can have an impact on the bottom's/submissive's ability to take wax on the nuts.

WAX
Candle wax should not cause burns, and any reddening of the skin should clear up in a few hours at the most.

  • Use cheap, plain wax candles of all types and shapes.
  • Avoid beeswax candles.
  • Avoid beef tallow candles.
  • Avoid candles with metallic colors since these often contain poisonous metal salts.
  • Coloring agents seem to affect the temperature at which candles melt (red candles tend to drip hotter than black or white.

In all cases remove any metal foil on the votive first. These foil tabs heat much hotter than the wax itself and can burn the bottom/submissive.

LETS PLAY
For the bottom/submissive, the feeling of getting waxed is as if near scalding liquid heat which quickly cools to a rigid splotch has been added to his body.

When these splotches are numerous and interconnected, it's a strange sensation of a thin shell which cracks and splits with movement.

On the tits and genitals it forms a shield that gradually insulates as it builds up.

Depending on the bottom's/submissive's condition (like he has done hot wax before, has a sun burn, has hair/no hair, has applied oil to his skin, is a wimp, or is a "I can take anything fool,") apply wax drop by drop from some heights; to start usually don't pour a large puddle of melted wax at one time (exception can be melted paraffin, discussed later).

You can control the temperature somewhat by raising and lowering the candle. The more wax applied, normally the closer you can get to the bottom's/submissive's fun spots.

If you attach votive candles to the bottoms/submissives, pool only the amount of wax needed to hold the votive on the body. (This is a wonderfully visual control scene).

How the bottom/submissive is restrained, the top's/dominant's game plan (if there is one), how much wax is already applied, hair/no hair condition can guide you in determining how much pooled wax is needed to hold the votive in place.

Caution: In all cases remove any metal foil on the votive first.

These foil tabs heat much hotter than the wax itself and can burn the bottom/submissive.

Again take your time. Roll the candle to melt the wax evenly.

Dribble it over the chest and belly. Try his tits. If your aim is good enough, you might be able to encase them.

Genitals tend to be a little more sensitive, (although I know some bottoms/submissives who feel nothing when someone beats the hell out of their nuts) so treat them gingerly until you know what he can tolerate.

If you are lucky enough to have a candle making kit with a special water bath heater for melting blocks of paraffin (or a hot plate and pan), you can dip his body parts or paint the melted wax onto him. Physical therapists do this to get deep heat into joints of arthritic patients.

Remember it's ABSOLUTELY essential or safety that the temperature of any wax used stay under 110 degrees F.

Painting and dipping are very sensual as the heat penetrates into your deeper tissues and wax builds up. Cracking it off is like breaking open a chrysalis.

If you manage to get a coating of wax over his penis, without his becoming erect, it's great fun to then stimulate him to a full hard-on as his dick breaks free of its waxy case.

If he is in a cage for the waxing scene, a good ending might be pouring the melted wax on him chest to his toes. Be sure the bottom's/submissive's neck and face are protected by a cloth, mask, or his hands. I know a bottom who was waxed in this manner and rubbed the melted wax all over his body as sun tan lotion. This also allowed the bottom to cool the wax in those areas which were specially sensitive.

If the bottom/submissive is very hairy, consider shaving him before a wax scene, as removing the wax will be a second pain trip (some want/need the second trip). Remember, that when you shave skin that is normally left unshaved, it normally becomes much more sensitive to subsequent stimulation.

Where hair is relatively long, as in the armpits or pubic area, comb it first to minimize tangles once it's caked with wax. The combing process can be a scene enhancement, as in leading the bottom/submissive to believe the wax is soon to be applied to those areas, when in fact they are never waxed or waxed much later.

CLEANUP
Use a curry comb (like they use on horses), regular comb, a brush, or your fingers to work loose large hunks of cooled wax; if necessary, cut the hair under the wax with a blunt scissors.

Just yanking the hairs out along with the wax can cause the equivalent of multiple small puncture wounds, which may need treatment with an antiseptic such as hydrogen peroxide or Betadine to avoid infection. This is specially true if the bottom's/submissive's blood vessels are very close to the service of the skin.

Remove the wax on a rug that can be vacuumed. Except for some very soft liquid paraffin wax, this is a much better way to get candle wax cleaned up rather than trying to clean it out of a tub.

Wax on a wall, clothing, or just about any cloth can be removed by using a paper towel and an iron. Just put the paper towel over the wax, apply the iron and the wax should stick to the paper towel.

Wax on leather can generally be cleaned up by simply rubbing the leather with a cloth.

FIRST AID
The focus of this part of this information is to identify burns etc. that relate to hot waxing, although, there is always overlapping with other forms of play.

Burns not only damage the skin and underlying flesh directly but can lead to infections and cause unwanted scarring.

Shock (circulatory failure) can occur from a severe or extensive burn; serious burns over large areas of the body are often fatal. In all s/m heat scenes, except branding and extremely heavy scenes with cigars, cigarettes, and matches, burns will not occur except by accident; in branding and the other scenes mentioned, limited, controlled burning occurs and must be handled properly to avoid problems.

Of course, in any play involving an open flame, there is some danger of uncontrolled accidental burns -- to the top/dominate as well as the bottom/submissive -- these can be much more serious than anything that would be deliberate inflicted, normally.

If serious accidental burning occurs in an s/m scene, immediately release the bottom/submissive from all restraints and remove any other equipment that causes pain or stress (tit clamps etc.).

Stop role- playing altogether, or modify the roles so that the bottom/submissive is no longer under stress. Tender loving care and emotional reassurance are essential to preventing shock as any specific localized treatment of the burn. The same goes for a top/dominate who gets burned during a scene; if the bottom/submissive is restrained, release him so he can help you -- you might need it depending on the severity of the burn.

Being able to recognize what kind of burn you have to deal with is essential to providing the appropriate first-aid treatment.

Classes of burns:

First Degree:

  • Only the outer, dead layer of skin is damaged, not the living tissue below it.
  • The burned area may be painful, red, and slightly swollen, but no blisters form.
  • Mild sunburns are first-degree burns.
  • Such burns generally heal on their own in two to three days.

First-aid for First Degree Burns

Immediately hold the burned area under running cold water, or submerge it in a bowl of very cold water, or apply an ice-water compress (do not apply the ice directly to burned skin).

Cooling the burned surface can prevent a first-degree burn from becoming a second degree burn. Keep the area cold until the coldness itself causes pain (at least 10 minutes), then stop until the burning pain returns. Repeat three or four times until the burn stops hurting seriously, Unless the burn is very minor, apply a dry, sterile dressing, bandage it, and leave it covered for a day or so.

Most experts advise against using any kind of lotions or salves on a burn, particularly greasy lotions or butter. They don't help, and they can attract dirt or cause bandages to stick painfully. Others, however, say it may help to apply an anesthetic spray (such as Solarcaine), aloe Vera cream, or vitamin E oil to a superficial burn--after the cooling procedure described above is completed.

Most first-degree burns should not require medical treatment, but see a doctor if the burn continues to hurt past the first day or had not diminished in size and redness after the second day.

Second Degree:

  • Damage reaches the first layers of living tissue in the skin.
  • The wounds typically form blisters and are painful and swollen.
  • They take one to two weeks to heal and must be protected from infections; and infected second-degree burn can require skin grafting to heal completely.

First-aid for Second Degree Burns

Cool burned area with cold or iced water as described above until pain subsides.

Do not try to puncture or drain blisters.

Do not apply lotions or other medications.

Using only clean, non-fluffy cloth that cannot shed fibers into the wound (never use cotton balls or batting), gently pat the wound dry and cover it with multiple layers of cloth (a clean handkerchief, pillowcase, or sheet can be used) or sterile dressings.

Burned arms or legs should be elevated above the level of the heart, to minimize shock. If there is any difficulty in breathing, elevate the head and shoulders slightly also.

After treatment, clear liquid from under a burn scab indicates normal healing: cloudy fluid or pus indicates infection--see a doctor as soon as possible.

Third Degree:

  • The full depth of skin is damaged.
  • Wounds look charred and are dry, firm, and painless to the touch (because the nerve endings are destroyed).
  • Complete healing takes a long time, sometimes many months, and nearly always requires medical treatment (brands can be successfully treated at home only because the skin area involved is so small).
  • The main dangers are that the trauma of the burn will cause shock and that the rupture in the skin covering will expose the inner flesh to infections, sometimes from the body's own waste products that cannot be carried away through the damaged skin.

Fourth, Fifth, and Sixth Degrees:

  • Tissue beyond the skin itself is burned, from the fat layer just beneath the skin down through the muscle and bone.
  • Such burns are among the most serious injuries anyone can have and require emergency medical attention just to prevent death, left alone to enable the wound to heal eventually.

First-aid for Third-degree burns and higher

Place a clean, cold cloth on the burn, or poor cool (not iced) water over the burn, and cover it with a thick, sterile, non-fluffy cloth or dressing.

Call for an ambulance immediately, or if the burn is small, take the victim to an emergency room by car or cab.

While waiting for an ambulance, or in a car, keep him lying down; if he's burned on the backside, lay him on his stomach. An arm or leg that's burned should be elevated above the level of his heart. If he's on his back and has any difficult breathing, elevate his head and shoulders slightly also.

The greatest immediate danger is shock; the main preventive measure is to alleviate stress and provide emotional support. The greatest long-range danger is infection once the skin's protection is compromised.