If you are a woman, and the thought of anal fisting leads you to wince, get hot, blanch very pale or feel curious, then this site has been written for you. After much scouring of the web, and combing endless fisting sites for men, it seems that there is a dearth of information about this somewhat taboo subject for women. So, as a woman who greatly enjoys this practice, I just thought I would write my own site. After all, if you want something done, you may as well do it yourself.

You will find the various sections peppered with hopefully useful links, and I can only encourage you to visit them. Some of them are mens' sites, as they DO contain some useful information. However, by and large I have tried to keep the information general.

Common Misconceptions

• Women cannot indulge in anal fisting because they are not built that way

Rubbish! It is not necessarily the easiest form of penetration if you are trying to enter deeply, due to the fact that "the rectum is not straight. After the short anal canal which connects the anal opening to the rectum, the rectum tilts toward the front of the body. A few inches in, it curves back - sometimes as much as 90 degrees. Then, after a few more inches, it swoops toward the front of the body once again. A person can learn about the shape of his or her rectum by gently inserting a soft object, trying different angles and body positions and concentrating on how it feels. Make sure the object has a flared base so that if you loose your grip, it won't slip into the rectum and become irretrievable." (Morin)

This is a picture of the lower digestive tract, the same in both men and women, though of course the guys have a prostate advantage. As you can see, there are plenty of twists and turns in there, but unlike the vagina, the ass is not "closed", so deeper penetration is possible with practice.

• Women do not have the physiology to enjoy anal fisting even if they can do it

OK, let's blow this one away as quickly as possible. Quoting Tristan Taormina "Physiologically, the anal area is rich in nerve endings, making it incredibly sensitive to stimulation. Women can also have our g-spots stimulated through anal penetration. Research now indicates that the clitoris is not just that little nub under the hood, but a complex set of internal nerves connected to pelvic muscles, what many sexologists call "the sprawling clitoral body." The expansion of the clitoris and our knowledge about it have contributed to a new vision of women's internal makeup and the orgasmic process. In addition, as anal expert Dr. Jack Morin points out, "The anal sphincters are intricately linked with all the other pelvic muscles; Masters and Johnson noted that they go into glorious spasms at exactly the same rate [as our genitals]. Every orgasm is, at least in part, an anal orgasm." So the anus is clearly a part of the orgasmic process." In addition, pressure in the anus directly behind the clitoral area can really drive you wild. As the helpful Morin notes, "Rectal pressure is especially important to enthusiasts of "fisting," a form of anal sex in which several fingers or even the entire hand and forearm are inserted into the rectum and sometimes into the lower colon. (Morin) The anus is a wonderful place to have stimulated in a wide variety of ways, and fisting is the one which gives perhaps the maximum amount of them all. It is certainly not to be written off through fear or disgust without at least an effort being made. You might well find the results worth the perseverance.

• Anal fisting always hurts

Of course ANY anal penetration can hurt. However, I am not advocating a rushed full on entry from the get go. Take it slowly. You have a long time, and the practice is fun. The following sequence (deleting penises if you are not partial to them) is a sensible path to follow. "Then came more fingers, tongues, vibrators, small dildos, bigger dildos, butt plugs, bigger butt plugs, penises, even an entire small hand." (Taormina) For a fantastic Fisting FAQ visit Red right, which, although a gay man's site, has so much wealth of generalized information and insight that it is one of the most revered tomes on the subject. As he points out, when asked how long does it take to learn to take a fist?: "That depends on what your ass has done before. Starting from being able to accept something the size of a large cock/dildo in your ass it can take years of steady play before you are ready to accept a hand inside. If you've played with larger toys you're already part way there. Generally, if a person can take a dildo about 3 inches (7.62 cm) in width their asshole is physically ready to take a fist. Their head may be another matter." Therein lies a very useful point. You're largest sex organ is your brain. Mental attitude is extremely important, and learning to relax and trust is the basis of all successful anal fisting.

• All women who enjoy anal fisting are lesbians

Definitely not so! "Liking anal stimulation does not equal homosexuality.
Many men and women enjoy having their anuses stimulated or stimulating it themselves during masturbation. On the other hand, some gay men do not.
...the two have no connection with each other." (Dr Sandor Gardos)

• All women who enjoy anal fisting are into "gender play", or think they are men or boys

Nope, wrong again. Plenty of women, both gay and straight, engage in fisting, without the fantasy of gender play. There are also plenty of women who ARE into gender fluid roles who love it as well. What are "Sirs, bois, Daddies, grrls etc"? Well I was trying to keep it simple, but actually, as is recounted in Gender Crash, trying to label people is futile, and belonging to any particular sub-group means little regarding who might or might not be engaging in any activity. "I realized that there is no open microphone, performance space, or poetry slam that would be comfortable for my partner, myself, or many of my friends that identified as trans/gender queer/butch/fairy/queen/dyke/boy chick/bear/ bisexual/and all the other labels & identities that don't fit into those two tiny boxes called male-female. So I started Gender Crash to give a performance space to this community...my community, because I want to see/hear/feel everything that you, the trans/gender/ queer/butch/fairy/queen/ dyke/boy chick/bear/bisexual/and all the other labels & identities that don't fit into those two tiny boxes called male-female are creating/writing/ and living."
No one is exempt. There are so many possible orientations and persuasions that it is ridiculous to argue that one can exclude ANY group, from the most mainstream to the most unusual, from ANY activity.

• Only butch women get into doing anal fisting

Certainly plenty of them do. Some of them (surprise surprise) are also into receiving. The emergence of the so called "butch bottom", who may be vanilla or BDSM, and into or not into gender play has been something of a revelation to both heterosexuals and gay women alike over recent years. Gender players such as "bois" "brats" and "bear cubs" are also sometimes into receiving. In advising a butch woman who did not feel like receiving vaginal penetration with her girlfriend, Lesbian Nation very helpfully and sensibly advised: "You might enjoy anal penetration, which can provide you with plenty of erotic stimulation and offer her the opportunity to penetrate you, if that’s what she likes. The anus is an extremely sensitive and delicate area of the body, filled with nerve endings that respond to sexual attention. Best of all, the anus is un-gendered: Everybody has one."

• Only femme women get into receiving anal fisting

As above with the butches, many femmes are into receiving. Some of them are also into giving. A woman looking like a prom queen might be called a femme, but she might be as voraciously dominant in attitude as any tough looking butch. This applies to the many women offering Professional Dominance services, the best directory of which is HERE. However, there are plenty of non-professional femmes who are into giving out some very intense sex with their partners, who may be men, or other femmes, or butch women who enjoy having a femme dominate them. I can speak from personal experience here (private smile). It certainly helps to let go of preconceptions about femmes. As one femme woman writes: "My definition of Femme is the appearance and mannerisms that one visibly associates with the actions and look of "ladylike" demeanors. The definition does not transcend into the bedroom analysis, because even in being Femme there are levels - Femme tops, strictly bottoms, Femme­butches, ultra Femmes, and the list goes on." Indeed it does. Trying to define people and slot them into neat categories defining who does what to whom is pointless. As one womens' group, MOB, points out: "Among our members are FemmeTops, Androgynous Subs, Wild Women, Butch Boys, Leather Grrl Switches, Packing Daddies, Pain Sluts, and Women of Questionable Morality. If you don't see yourself here, we probably just haven't met you yet."

• Only BDSM players get into anal fisting

Many BDSM players are into anal fisting, male and female, for reasons that may involve dominance and submission revolving around physical and mental pleasure, or which revolve around the recipient enjoying a certain amount of anal pain which does not put him or her in danger. However, many vanilla people enjoy this form of stimulation. Why? Good old fashioned pleasure really. "Both men and women can respond orgasmically to anal sex without direct genital stimulation. Women probably do so through pelvic muscle contractions - and a small minority even through the sheer excitement of being anally penetrated." (Morin)

• A man cannot anally fist a woman

I rest my case. Check out the opening picture, and the rest if you want. While not a site I like, it illustrates the point.

• Anal fisting must be "messy"

Wrong wrong wrong! Some people like to douche or enema before anal sex as a precautionary measure. Wearing gloves is a wise practice always. Many experienced fisters avoid high roughage diets and fruit for a day or two and stoke up on pizza or pasta type food prior to an anal assignation. No point in tempting fate. Others worry that fisting anally will induce their bowel to evacuate. This is usually when you are new to the sensations. Once you learn that this feeling of being full is NOT an enormous wad of excrement, "people enjoy the feelings of pressure and fullness once they understand that these sensations do not presage an impending bowel movement." (Morin) How true.

• Anal fisting makes your anus loose or damages it long-term

Another myth explodes into tatters. You will not have reduced control, awkward bowel movements or get hemorrhoids from anal sex. In fact your anus might actually tighten due to regular exercise! Why? Well, surprise surprise, "The anal sphincter muscle is designed to expand and contract an unlimited number of times. Stretching it will not make it any less able to constrict, just as stretching your hamstrings does not make them weaker. There have even been a number of long-term studies which found that there was absolutely no loss of muscle tone or the ability to contract regardless of the amount of anal sex a person has had." (Dr. Sandor Gardos)

• If you enjoy anal fisting you are sick and/or perverted

Well, what can one say? Dr Gloria Brame, commenting on so-called deviance in general, states: "A fetishist may, by nature, be balanced and happy; but if he or she is routinely ostracized and derided for his or her fetish, you can be sure it will create some psychological problems." Now whose fault is that? What happened to live and let live? My personal belief is that there is no point in trying to convince those who think that this form of sex is perverse of any other view. They will think it anyway. You just cease to seek or care about the approval of others. So I am giving the last word to Alice, who very sensibly concludes that "...perhaps the sexual orientation of someone who finds pleasure in any part of his- or herself is far less important than his or her awareness and recognition that our bodies are ours to enjoy -- or to ignore -- if we so choose." (Alice)

All of the above are very common ideas about anal fisting, but in fact anal fisting has been around as a somewhat revered form of love making for centuries. It is a well known Tantric practice and it was not confined to either gender. For some handy common sense tips about anal sex read Morin's entire article and visit HERE.