The Verbal Edge

By Annah

I am often asked by people new to the Lifestyle "what makes a good scene?" or "how does one set up a good scene?" I think we all develop our own styles as we explore and grow into the Lifestyle and for some perhaps this will be of no interest, but there is one simple basic tool I always like to mention when helping others who are starting out.

This one is free of cost and can add some amazing dynamics to "play time". It is always available and doesn't even take up any space in your toy bag. It can drop a submissive to her knees or make him shudder with anticipation.

This little handy tool is your voice. I have found a word or two spoken in the right tone or the right timing can cause delightful reactions. It can turn a dull butter knife into a razor sharp stiletto. A simple few words like "be careful, this is sharp" can have a profound effect on a blindfolded submissive. It is a way to go beyond the body and touch the mind. It is intimate and exciting. It is also a wonderful way to create focus for both the Dominant and the submissive in a situation where there are other people around.

As simple as it sounds, for some talking doesn't come easy. I have also been asked, "How do I know what to say?" Once again personal style comes in to play once you have gained a little experience, eventually with a little practice it can come naturally. But for the beginning Dominant, I offer a few suggestions; say some of what you are thinking at the time or say what you see. "I love the way you look when I have you bound for me." say "these restraints are good and tight, you are mine now." Whisper in her ear, "Relax you won't be going anywhere for a while except where I choose to take you to..."

One of my personal favorites is something I do when I don't have a structured plan for a scene. I will restrain my submissive then sit back and look at her for a while and contemplate what I might want to do, out loud. It goes something like this, "What do I want to do to you tonight? There are so many options. Shall I get out my knives or maybe just the floggers? It has been a while since I have used this butt plug on you that might be fun, hmmm? I see your marks have healed since we last played, good, that means I can make new ones... I wonder what kind of pattern this braided leather belt would make on your ass..." I could go on but I think you get the idea. This kind of talk not only puts my submissive on the edge but also helps me come up with a last minute plan, if I don't have one. I watch her for reactions to what I say and then act accordingly.

Some Dominants don't like to ask questions, because they feel it gives the submissive too much control. I am not really asking for an answer anyway. I might say, "this little paddle left some nice marks last time, it hurt didn't it?"

Other times I might ask, "Do you want me to use this crop?" Regardless of her answer I will do what I please anyway, and she knows it. At times a little dialog can be fun as well. Keep in mind though that the further into a scene you get the submissive may not be able to converse as well. Here is an example.

"I see that you are very wet right now, is there something that you want? Tell me."

" I want to cum"

"Do you now? Then tell me how, what do you want me to do to you?"

"i want you to fuck me...please"

"That is not enough, fuck you where? With what? "

"Please?"

"Please is not enough, I want details. Use your words, tell me in a way that will inspire me, convince me"

This conversation can go on for as long as you want. I like to draw it out, tease a little while doing so. Maybe run my crop over her tender places or drag my knife over the parts she speaks of. I might end the dialog with something like, "I think not, not now. I have a better plan, right now I want to...." You can fill in the blanks here. Some days when I am feeling generous I might actually give her what she wants. She never knows what I will do and this is precisely what keeps her talking. I am very interested in what is in her mind. I want to own and move her thoughts.

Any way you look at it, your words, your voice can be a powerful tool when creating a scene. I know this method is not for everyone. Some Dominants demand utter silence from their submissives. Each of us has our own kinks and preferences. It simply depends on who your are and what you like. As for me, I like my knives very sharp, the same thing goes for my verbal edge.