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Safe Calls

With the introduction of the Internet the ability to meet people who enjoy the same things as you becomes much easier. Relationships can be established rather quickly. However, it is one thing to have an on-line relationship and quite another to actually meet for the first time. Due to the sheer nature of what D/s, B&D or SM can entail, precautions should be taken. After all you would hope that the person whom you have been chatting with has been sincere in his/her intentions. If their sincerity is lacking it could very well turn out to be a disastrous situation. When meeting with any new "play partner" it is advisable to take certain measures to ensure your safety. Make arrangements for a "safe call", no matter how comfortable you are with the person.

A safe call is simply a phone call or several phone calls to a trusted friend or other party at pre-arranged times. You can have pre-arranged questions which if answered improperly will alert the trusted friend or other party that you are in trouble and need assistance. Code words can also be used for alert purposes. The proper authorities will then be notified. If you do not make your safe call the authorities WILL be at the door so DO NOT FORGET.

The person accepting your safe call needs information. The following is a guideline and all data is negotiable (especially such things as photographs as not everyone has a camera at hand):

  • Your full name
  • Your address and phone number(s)
  • Make, model, colour and plate number of your car
  • Detailed information if you are using other methods of transportation
  • Their full name
  • Their address and phone number(s)
  • Physical description of the person you are meeting
  • Make, model, colour and plate number of their car
  • Pictures of you both
  • Where you are meeting (be specific)
  • The address and phone number(s) of the place (if applicable)
  • When you are meeting (time and date)

And any other pertinent information related to the meeting

If the person is not providing this information or he/she is reluctant, you may want to reconsider. If the person is legitimate he/she will have no problem giving the information you request. Serious people in the lifestyle are aware of these things and should offer no resistance. In fact they should encourage your safety. By all means let them know why you are asking all these questions. It should also be their responsibility to make sure that you indeed make the phone call(s) as it will be their door the police will show up at if you don’t.

You should make your first call before you leave home to let your safe call know that you are leaving for your meeting. Then another when you arrive at your destination to say you have arrived safe and the person you are meeting is there. Then one (1) hour into the meeting and every hour or as arranged after that. One more when you leave the meeting, and the last call when you are at home safe.

This may seem like a lot of calls but your safety is what counts.