I'm sharing a R/L true-life posting from a groups' list as both an illustration that Dom/me's, as well, can be targets/victims, and to pose a question to A/all here. Read the posting *first*.

The controversy and local discussion, and My question, centers on the *full* disclosure of the perpetrators' identity within the community. I'm of the opinion that the submissives' identity should be on a billboard. O/others disagree.

Collective opinions here ????

Read, think about what happened to this Dom, and, above all, *learn* from His unfortunate experience.

From the Northern California BDSM Community

This is my personal account of a meeting that went very bad and no one is required to read it.

Since many of you know me personally I felt this was the best place to tell the community about an experience I just went through. I met a sub online who lives locally, Yuba City, and after many conversations in various chat mediums and daily phone calls we met to play at her home. She was well aware of how hard I am and wanted that kind of use. Last Saturday night I went to see her and we did play very hard as the bruises on her body would attest. She could take a lot and can without a doubt be called a pain-slut. Before any play started she asked for me not to do a couple of things, one of which was not to restrain her. I honored her requests for the entire night. During the course of the evening we had sex, oral and vaginal. Part of the play was vaginal slapping, light caning and paddling. At the end of the evening she even paid me for coming up (part of the humiliation aspect agreed on in advance) and set up an additional meeting for the next day since she had to go to work that night. As I was leaving she asked for a few more swats from the paddle on the back of her thighs, which I gave her. We then hugged and kissed and I left. I left my toy bag there since I was coming right back. AT one point this girl was with one of the local Modesto members, which to me gave her credibility in my eyes although I never talked to them about her.

I returned the next day, Sunday at noon, and no one was at home. I called her cell phone and some other woman answered. When I questioned her about the girl she said their phones had been switched but she would get hold of her and let her know I was there. I stood by my car and then a cop car pulled up. I was told to stand away from my car, asked if I had any weapons, told to turn around and was cuffed with no explanation. Very shortly 2 more police cars arrived, I was read my rights and told I was being held as a suspect for aggravated sexual assault. I was then taken to the local city jail and put in a holding cell. Four hours later I was taken to the detectives office, read my rights again and signed a paper saying I was making a statement and had been told my rights. I told the detective the entire story from beginning to end. He then told me I was being charged and that "its a dangerous game you play". I was taken to the county jail facility booked for the following charges: Rape, Lewd and Lascivious acts, Insertion of a foreign object and Terrorism. They left me in the cell for 2 days and as you might imagine I knew life as I knew it was over. The bruises on her vagina was all the evidence they needed in my way of thinking to convict me of forcible rape. On Tuesday afternoon I was scheduled for my first court appearance. When the jailer arrived to take me he called my name, I jumped down off the steel bunk and he said," roll up your stuff, all charges have been dropped". This sadist started to cry.

I was released very quickly, had to pay over $250.00 to get my car back and left Yuba City. I have since lost my position at work and been demoted to a lower position, which shows some compassion on my boss's part since I was using the company computer to chat with this girl. Something everyone in the company had been told NOT to do. I am very very lucky that I am not headed for prison for many years and could well have been there for the rest of life. This is just a warning to all the Doms/Dommes out there. be very sure of who you play with... they do have control if they want to use it. This could have happened to anyone, but I was just lucky that someone in the DA's office took the time to check it closely and could find no evidence of force, although I don't know how. Perhaps her statement or the fact she was never restrained did it. The charge of abuse was never brought up and I would have thought it would have, considering how bruised she was, but they knew it was consensual play. As you might had gathered I am dropping out of the lifestyle for awhile but just wanted to tell the people I know why. If anyone wants to copy this to let others know what can happen, you have my permission.